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Determined to SucceedPat and Vangie - MPM
September 06 OK.... I have been beaten but I refuse to give upHow many months it has been not blogging and not working toward a goal. Oh telling myself I am going to start tomorrow. Tomorrow never comes but one thing is for sure those pounds sneak right back up on you. I am back up to 254, bummer but it is my own fault. I am making a pact with myself. Back to eating, exercising, and enjoying life. Pat and I have had a great summer. We bought some peddle bikes and we rode them basically everywhere we could. We were conserving fuel, saving money, and exercising. Bike riding is soooo much fun! I love it, but I hurt my back about a month ago and that basically put me back so many months. Basically I gave up and started eating, my will power diminished. I am done eating poorly. I don't want to have a "cheat day" that turns into a week or two of eating everything. I am so happy Biggest Loser is starting in 11 days!!! Motivation from that show is amazing and it is awesome to see the changes I make by watching the show. If only it could be on 52 weeks per year! Well, I am planning on a bike ride tomorrow to the farmer's market to check out some of the local produce. I can get my cardio out of the way bright and early and then focus my energy on the other things I need to accomplish this weekend. I am going to try to get better at blogging, if for nothing else to help my own psyche. I feel like a failure. How disappointed Bob and Jillian would be to see how far I fell off the wagon. How frustrated I am to feel my clothes tight on me, AGAIN! So, the plan I have is to start journaling my eating and exercising here daily, putting my thoughts and feelings down so maybe I can get things off my mind, clear my conscience so I don't eat my sorrows, happiness, or blah days away!
On a happier and more upbeat note, Pat and I will be celebrating our 7th wedding anniversary on Monday. WOW! Seven years, though not 20 or 30, still a great accomplishment for both of us. He is such a good man, loving, and FUN to be around. Happy Anniversary Baby! You truly are my knight in shining armour!!!! We went to Red Rocks to the 3 Doors Down concert on Tuesday.... AWESOME!!!!! That is all I can say about that :o) We had so much fun, definitely a place to go to a concert if you ever get the chance!!!!! The boys are both on Varsity Football this year! GO CATS!!!! I am so proud of them. It is amazing how fast they grow up. We have a junior and a sophomore and then our daughter is going to be the BIG 20... I cannot believe I have a 20 year old daughter... is that crazy or what? I also am almost finished with school.... Nov 24, 2008 I will receive my BSHA.... OH MY!!!! It is almost surreal! But a HUGE accomplishment, none the less. I hope that one day I can feel just as accomplished getting to my goal weight. It is a long hard road, but so was going to school fulltime and trying to be a good mom and wife. I think I may have failed the past two years on the good mom and wife, but I did the best I could I think. Trying to find a way to be successful at this life long struggle, just like most.
Well, I look forward to this new weightloss challenge. I look at it as new because I cannot dwell on the past.
Determined to succeed!
Vangie May 27 It doesn't get easierWell I wish I could say it gets easier but alas it does not. I am finally down to 249 but stuck at that for a month now less than fifty pounds from my main goal and I am sucking wind hard.................. It seems like the better I do the easier it is to blow it. If only we all had bob it would make it easier they make it seem so easy on biggest loser but the hard truth is that it isn't. You try and try you fail and fail skinny people can't understand hell i don't understand I work out more than most people I know yet still I exist as a porker. Alas enough with the crying tommorro is a new day and a new work out I hope everyone is well. May 26 Rough couple of weeks...We are fighting the internal and external fat-seeking food groups! No joke. Tomorrow is a new day and both Pat and I are resolved to get back on the wagon and continue our journey. We have had a couple of bad weeks... stress eating, eating to eat, eating things we should not be eating, trying to ruin all of our hardwork. But this time.... we are stopping the vicious cycle once again and going to start eating better before all the pounds and inches have found us once again. I have to say, we are still exercising but we are eating the calories burned, instead of watching the things we put in our mouths and the quantities. So, here we go again...this time, just like all the other times we have to motivate each other because we really don't have anyone else. I have put away my baker's apron and have decided I cannot bake those yummy cookies and cakes because we eat them :( So, back to the WW boards for recipes we can eat, no more trips out to eat for awhile. It will save us money in this crappy economy. The good thing is exercise is always free, so no excuses about not being able to afford it. We can afford the exercise and our bodies and souls will be much happier for it. As difficult as it is to get on the scale I am a much more motivated person when I see the numbers going down then when I see them going up. The evil scale and I will have to become friends... is that even possible? It seems like it is always so much easier to lose weight when the BL is in season. The motivational factor of the show is amazing!!!! I guess it is a good thing we have them DVR'd time to break out the last season and find the motivation we had for a good three months! My sister is still getting married in August and I have found a really cute shirt I would like to fit in by that date, so I have put it in a place I can see it and I am hoping that will give me some motivation, because I will look totally HOT in it and I would love for my husband to be proud of my accomplishment... especially in the weight department. Well, I am off to finish some work.... getting some sleep and then getting up in the morning to do a cardio workout before work so when I get home tomorrow night I can focus on homework and feeling good about my food choices throughout the day!!! For any who are lurking.... leave us a message... we would love to hear from you!!!!
good night May 13 Long time no blog....How time passes. I am playing with the same 6 pounds.... for the past month. Why? I think I am self sabatouging myself. I get to a weight and I am excited and then I slow down my progress. I realize I must continue to have motivation, but I am finding motivation to be a hard concept to grasp. School is going well, 5 classes left to my degree.... it is so close yet so far :o) Pat is doing AMAZING!!! I cannot say enough good things about him. He is down 30 + pounds and kicking butt. I feel so much better when I am exercising and eating right and in all honesty eating right is not the problem, it is the motivation to exercise. Pat says 25 minutes and who does not have 25 minutes of down time when they can do a little cardio or a ball workout? My life is full of excuses.... and that would be me. I would prefer to sleep rather than exercise or do something that does not require as much energy. Sad fact but a true one :o) I am working on getting back on track this week and so far it has gone pretty good. I have not exercised.... but have worked on eating habits. Positive self talk is something I am trying to do more often. I see changes in my body, in my face, and in my outlook. Stress is an evil creature and one that makes me want to eat something sweet... not sugar free sweet but real live rich and sweet.... knowing I should be eating fruit or a sugar free treat but sometimes the sugar fix is needed. Is this an excuse? I don't know. I want to believe it is not. I want to feel it is ok to eat something that may not be good for me but stop at that one instance, not fall into the old way of thinking I can start again tomorrow. If I am not careful, tomorrow will NEVER get here. I find it easier to eat healthy at work when I take breakfast, lunch and snacks. I know I can always go to Subway for a great lunch or supper. I know I can eat my oatmeal for breakfast, a banana for snack and start my day with a large glass of ice water... I treat myself once or twice a week to a nonfat, sugar free latte...I have downgraded my size from large to medium and now can usually feel just as satisfied with a small. With the nicer weather I hope I will feel better about going out for a walk with the dog. I am really going to make an effort to blog more, it helps me with motivation and when I started this journey it certainly was not to quit when the motivation waned. I will be successful... I will be proud of me and I am hoping my husband can be just as proud of me...goals accomplished for both of us. April 02 Winners to be announced April 8, 2008According to the website that is "the" day. I think this journey has been amazing. It is not necessarily about winning the contest. To me, it is about being a part of something bigger. Knowing that when I see those numbers during the show of the weight loss challenge that I have been a small part of it all! I am not saying winning would not be AWESOME, but in the end it will be pretty exciting watching it from the sidelines too! Pat and I have had our ups and downs with the whole motivation thing. I have played with three pounds due to that lack of motivation. I am fully aware of how difficult this journey has been for all of us. One thing that I have learned is many or most of us are emotional eaters. I read on one of the websites that one must come to terms with this, recognize the triggers, and be able to move past it. I, for one, am a closet eater, if no one sees me do it then it is ok. WRONG!!!! It is not ok because in the end I am lying to myself. I work hard in the gym to not reap the benefit. I eat right until I decide I don't want to. Then I obsess about the food I want to eat. Now, this week I have some how regained my motivation. Thinking about Mother's Day and how I would like to be 10 pounds lighter by then. I don't know if I can do it, but it is a small goal I can work towards. I have found strength in many of the "friends" I have on Spaces. It is fun to see the results, read the blogs, see how creative EVERYONE has been. I will not feel sad for not winning because in the end, we are all winners. We are lighter, healthier, and more motivated then we were before the challenge. Would we do it again.... every time they have it. When we reach goal we would still be cheerleaders for those who are just embarking on the journey or who are trying to win the battle against obesity. I proudly tell everyone how this challenge has helped me to "get it" I am not saying there will be those days when I put the wrong things in my mouth but there will hopefully be more days where I have the resolve I need to make healthier choices. :o) The cake that Pat has in the picture for his birthday is actually a low fat cake. It is a Jello cake  ... he likes extra jello. I made the cake with applesauce instead of oil, egg whites only, used sf Jello and Cool Whip Free as the topping. It was yummy and did not make us feel guilty for eating such a wonderful treat! Another thing this challenge has done for my entire family is make us eat healthier. I know teenagers would prefer eating out, going to fast food, and eating tons of sweets but not my boys! My youngest, Trevor, does not like to eat out too much. Lately if we do go out to eat he will say we eat out too much, LOL, now that is an accomplishment. Pat and I have made our children more aware of healthy eating habits. They know our country is considered the most obese in the world. What a sad state of affairs, hopefully those who are on the journey will continue and we can irradicate this deadly disease, because regardless of what those without a weight problem say, obesity is a disease. We can all attest to this. Well, I am going to step down from my soap box.... but these are my thoughts. I wish everyone the best in their continued adventure. I am still looking forward to continuing with everyone who wants the same. Stay tuned.... I will post another night regarding the AWESOME, EXCITING, and somewhat sad episode this week. Good night all!!!
Thanks for visiting!
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